I graduated today. I don't feel any different, possibly because I've already been so emotionally over high school and every tradition associated with it. I meant to wear my dad's wedding ring around my neck like I've been doing lately. I'm kind of upset that I forgot it. I have two tassels so my sister suggested that I leave my extra one at Syd's grave. I wish Amy would call me, even though right now is probably a tough time. Her daughter would have been right there with us, except most likely at SCPA.
I've been reading my notebooks of notes between Syd and I lately. They all make me laugh and smile until I get to the very last note she wrote me. She had so many good things to say about me and such good advice. But the last note she told me that I should have other things to talk about besides my problems and that if I don't care what people think about me, I shouldn't care if I don't have friends. We were fighting at this point in the notebook and it really makes me sad that that was the last note she wrote me. I think ever since then, I talk about my problems not in a whining, teenage way, but a "Hey, this is what's going on in my life. It sucks, but it won't matter in a year" sort of way. Or so I'm told.
I've been reading my notebooks of notes between Syd and I lately. They all make me laugh and smile until I get to the very last note she wrote me. She had so many good things to say about me and such good advice. But the last note she told me that I should have other things to talk about besides my problems and that if I don't care what people think about me, I shouldn't care if I don't have friends. We were fighting at this point in the notebook and it really makes me sad that that was the last note she wrote me. I think ever since then, I talk about my problems not in a whining, teenage way, but a "Hey, this is what's going on in my life. It sucks, but it won't matter in a year" sort of way. Or so I'm told.
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