Wednesday, April 28, 2010

282.







Cleveland, OH.

I think I have made the final decision to title my book "Farewell to All These Rotten Teeth." It's a Carissa's Wierd song title but I think it is fitting for how my photos are turning out. It seems to be a consensus that I've made these buildings look like people with faces. Then again I'm a strong believer that every old building has its own character and sound. Two more weeks and this will be finished. Five weeks until my show goes up. There is a lot of work to be done.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

281.

I was unaware that expressing your feelings got you into trouble. I'm starting to speak with a more open tongue. I won't get anywhere in life if I can't vocalize what I want.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

280.

I had another "dream visit" from my dad. I don't even remember what the dream was about but I remember him looking how I like to remember him. When I moved to Chicago, I threw away most of the pictures of him from when he was sick. I don't want to remember him like that. I want to remember the strong, loving man that I am proud to have called my father. He had this sweatshirt that said "Any man can be a father, it takes a real man to be a dad."

Thursday, April 15, 2010

279.

I wonder if you know you kiss me in your sleep.

Monday, April 12, 2010

278.





Vine Street. Cincinnati, OH.

The most rewarding thing in the world is loving all of the film you’ve shot for something you’re really passionate about and your peers loving it as well. I’m really anxious to put my book together. I’m also really anxious for my show. So many people are excited for it and/or traveling for it. I hope it ends up being worth their time.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

277.

I will be sending out these two mixed tapes tomorrow. My unhealthy obsession with the 90s and 90s inspired bands is obvious in the first one. I hope the second one doesn't evoke any suicidal thoughts.

1. Some Kind Of Cadwallader - Algernon Cadwallader
2. The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter - The Anniversary
3. First Day Back - Braid
4. Little League - Cap'n Jazz
5. The Dusk Of Us - Colossal
6. First Down - Football, etc.
7. Late Night Conversations - The Forecast
8. The Moon Is Down - Further Seems Forever
9. Surprise Party - Grown Ups
10.Magnet - Joie de Vivre
11. It's Been A Long Time Since I Smelled Beautiful - Look Mexico
12. Ferdinand The Bull - The One Up Downstairs
13. Red & Blue Jeans - The Promise Ring
14. Sam Rudich - Snowing
15. Johnny On The Spot - Texas Is The Reason
16. Spirit Desire - Tigers Jaw
17. Coin-Laundry Loser - Twothirtyeight

1. Blood Bank - Bon Iver
2. Anthems for a Seventeen Year-Old Girl - Broken Social Scene
3. All Apologies And Smiles, Yours Truely, Ugly Valentine - Carissa's Wierd
4.The Good Things - Chris Staples
5. In Stitches - David Bazan
6. Angel In The Snow - Elliott Smith
7. How To Make Love Stay - Empire! Empire! (I Was A Lonely Estate)
8. My Backwards Walk - Frightened Rabbit
9. Anchor - Into It. Over It.
10. Rowing A Dead Horse - Kind of Like Spitting
11. Sounds Like Sunday - Mineral
12. Baby Blue Sedan - Modest Mouse
13. Slow Show - The National
14. Everything Must Go - The Weakerthans
15. I Was the Fool Beside You for Too Long - Yo La Tengo

276.

Good Luck : Sleep With No Bad Dreams

You know those moments that you replay in your head and you end up smiling? Yeah, most of those moments are about you. It feels good to not want you the way that I did or at least not as much. I've realized that strong friendships are so much more important than romantic relationships, especially when it comes to you.

So near asleep I hear your breath, the root of living in your chest. It is the fact that you are here. It is the proof that you are here. What's done should just be done. Don't talk just use our lungs. The brains that your dad said you had, you lost them. Terrified of our potential, and all the ways we might fail to meet it. 'Round here we are all the same, we want sleep with no bad dreams in our own bed with heat from somebody who won't keep me awake. The simplest act is still the one that we'll remember when we're done. The last thing I hope I forget, when everything else starts to slip, is sleeping over your parents' bedroom. We turned 18 not long ago. The open window had made is so cold. For me you shut it, then came back to bed. 'Round here we are all the same, we want sleep with no bad dreams in our own bed with heat from somebody who won't keep me awake. So nothing risked is nothing gained. It's the surest way to stay safe. Afraid to spell out the ways that we think we could help each other. So lay next to me tonight. Though I may not be satisfied I will stay by your side and be company till the morning light.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

275.

Nana Grizol : Atoms

The color of an afternoon just like when you were 5 years old. The moon over the ocean I've seen from a island evening. Progression that starts to lose its meaning. If we have spent most of a lifetime dreaming then dreaming is the state we shall keep. Stories of our solitude will sing themselves to sleep. And we will sing to everything the stories of where we have been, the history that's coursing through our veins. No, nothing factual is written on a page. So surely and so steadily a slowly moving cloud will whisper "I am but for hours born to last." Your sogging soaking future is my foggy fading past and so now if you want to wish upon me, wish upon me fast. Whatever can be held in your heart is surely yours to grasp so you wish for a picture of all of the people you have had the pleasure to know or a postcard from all of the places that you ever wanted to go. Saying "You are here now on this magical night." The sun and sky at sunset, well, its such a stunning sight. You can sleep safely and soundly and you are loved. And nothing ever does begin like nothing ever ends. Ask every atom in your body and they'll surely tell you "Friend, I am old as time and older still." And you are made of everything you love, you feel, or kill. I will outlive you, and forgive you, and be just a baby still.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

274.

Finals are soon approaching. I'm even more excited about my color final than I was about my black and white final. If all goes will in this bookmaking process, I'm thinking about making a few to sell at my show and/or on Etsy. The fact that the final product will be all hand made is going to be extremely rewarding, more so than just matting my photographs.

I have my 33 credit hours for my first year of four year plan. I was afraid that I wasn't going to be able to graduate in four years considering the BFA has a significant amount of required credit hours (128). Please explain to me how in preparation for my second year I am already thinking about graduate school.

The assignment was to make a two diptychs and a triptych from a passage of Einstein’s Dreams. The novel fictionalizes Albert Einstein as a young scientist who is troubled by dreams as he works on his theory of relativity in 1905. The book consists of 30 chapters, each exploring one dream about time that Einstein had during this period. I chose this part of a passage: “Imagine a world in which there is no time. Only images… Red hair of a lover, wild mischievous, promising.”


Thursday, April 1, 2010

273.



Happy nineteenth birthday, beautiful.
We're always missing you.